This piece is an attempt at creating a vessel that properly embodies what I consider to be the ugliest aspects of myself; the ones that served a purpose at one point in my life, be it for protection or otherwise, but that I’ve since outgrown. And yet, I have found myself unable to release these aspects of myself, which has been a barrier to the growth that is necessary for me to continue. I view these past versions of myself as sort of spirits who are possessing my body, unwilling to be shed despite having served their purpose. And so, the intention with this work was to create an inhabitable form for these sort of ghosts of myself. I created an organic, though much less complex, body/organism to be an immediately available vessel for these demons once exorcised. The thinking is that they’ll be more willing to leave me if they have the immediate comfort of a new body to occupy. Once transferred to this new form, the organic and already-decomposing body will begin to rot, eventually successfully laying to rest these parts of me.
The form itself was created using grapefruit rind, grapefruit membrane, sewing thread, and sewing needles. The grapefruit components were collected over a period of weeks, all having been prepared and consumed by me, and preserved until they were ready to be assembled.